Thursday, December 25, 2008

Tragedy At The North Pole

Weeks after refusing a government bailout Santa Claus who put $1.4bn (£1bn) into Bernard Madoff's fraud scheme has killed himself in his North-pole office.

Claus was found sitting at his work desk with both wrists slashed, a bottle of pills was found near him, but there was no suicide note.

Mr Madoff is accused of running a $50bn (£34bn) Ponzi scheme that wiped out investors around the world.

Bernard L Madoff walking down Lexington Ave

Mr Madoff's fraud has ensnared Wall Street investors and charities around the world, although the full extent of the losses is as yet unknown.

He is under house arrest in his Manhattan apartment, and his assets have been frozen.

Phyllis Molchatsky, a 61-year-old retiree from New York, is seeking $1.7m in damages from the US Securities and Exchange Commission.

It is believed to be the first attempt by an investor to recover losses from the SEC.

Mrs Claus was not available for comment but Long-socks one of the head Elves said: " Business as usual this year and all the good children not in 3rd world countries will get their presents."

"Next years Christmas is uncertain", commented the Ghost of Christmas future.

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