Tuesday, December 18, 2007

White Is The New Black

Lee Thomas the 40 year-old African-American Fox anchor and entertainment reporter for Detroit has a disease called vitiligo.
The disorder destroys pigment-making cells. White patches appear on different parts of the body, in the mouth, nose, and the retina.
There is no known cause. There is no cure, and it's very random. Scientists are looking into the illness as a way to study the evolutionary changes that man has developed over the millenniums.

Dr. Sancy Leachman, associate professor of dermatology at the University of Utah, calls vitiligo stigmatizing, driving some to even consider suicide. It's not fatal, but experts say vitiligo robs people of self-confidence, evokes ridicule , reduces penis size , causes unpleasant stares as you lose your rhythm on the dance floor , and pushes some into unforced seclusion.

Mr Thomas without his makeup on.

Thomas uses makeup to conceal his skin discoloration. At first he thought his career was over but has since won an Emmy award and routinely travels to Hollywood for interviews with celebrities including Will Smith, Tom Cruise, Steve Segal and Halle Berry and has done a news segment on the story and has now written a book about the disease titled "Turning White: A Memoir of Change" to hi-light it and explain that its not catchy like leprosy and to debunk any myths about it.

The good news is that in about 10 years Mr Thomas will be Caucasian and will not have to face racial stereotyping such as getting pulled over by the police for no reason and can now drink at any water fountain he wants.

Top geneticist Dr Brad Ovitt for the Mengele Research centre says, " We believe that we can isolate and manipulate the gene that causes this disease in order to give every person of colour the chance at being white because being Caucasian is awesome."

Don Imus, the American humorist, philanthropist, writer, radio and television talk show host who got into trouble for referring to some coloured women as "Nappy headed ho's" said eariler today, " Now I feel vindicated. No one can call me a racist because the women will be white but still have nappy hair. The fact I called them ho's is irrelevant as that's acceptable in todays media and society, just ask 50 Cent and Santa."

Dick Peterson the current Grand wizard of the Hogwart's Seattle branch of the Klu Klux Klan said, " I see this as a government plan to destroy the Klan but it won't happen. We will still hate the Jews and the Catholics er I mean to say we only support the existence of white Protestants and hate no one. We fully expect our membership to swell once the coloureds turn white."

Former US President Bill Clinton said, " Martin Luther King's dream of equality will now be realised once medical science makes this possible this is great news for mankind though I will miss the dark meat ."

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