Thursday, April 24, 2008

Drunk Vader Pounds The Nerdi Knights

Barney Jones 26, aka Jonba Hehol, and his brother Daniel Jones, 21, aka Morda Hehol, have formed the first Jedi 'church' - in Holyhead

Barney Jones and cousin Michael are members of the Jedi church in Holyhead, Wales in honour of the Star Wars' knights.

It has about 30 members locally and "thousands worldwide".

The cousins had been filming themselves playing with light sabres in the garden.
Suddenly a man jumped over the garden wall wearing the bin bag shouting, "Darth Vader!"

Arwel Wynne Hughes, 27, from Holyhead was under the bin bag and very intoxicated, he wielded a metal crutch and hit Barney Jones over the head , leaving him with a headache and a bad boo boo.
He then laughed and hit Michael Jones in the thigh, causing bruising and severe soiling of trousers.

Both grown men who still live with their mothers were left upset by the incident and they believed it was pre-planned.

When Hughes was charged with assault and failed to turn up at the court on time District Judge Andrew Shaw issued an arrest warrant, adding: "I hope the force will soon be with him."

Hughes turned up and the case at Holyhead magistrates court resumed.

Prosectutor Nia Lloyd said that the pair who will die virgins believe "very strongly in the church and their religion and one day the Millennium Falcon shall beam them up and save them at the end of the world."

The court heard that Hughes has a "chronic alcohol problem" and had drunk the best part of a 10 litre box of wine and that the two dorks were asking for it.

The court heard Hughes had previous convictions, including affray, assault and disorderly behaviour with a Romulan Warbird which was brutally plucked in the Wookie.

The trial will continue in May, if Hughes is sentenced he may be sent to the Klingon penal colony of Rura Penthe.

5 comments:

frog ponds rock... said...

Thankyou thankyou thankyou..

This cheered me up heaps.. and the fact that they will die virgins was truly the icing on the cake...

Marmarbug said...

OMG! Where do you fin this stuff? It makes me laugh!

B said...

the two poor geek fellas dont deserve this international abuse, it's people like them who're required to make people like me feel better.


darth vader is a f*cking genius though!

hey you're irish!

Kimberly said...

I love it!..........and thanks for stopping by my site. You're welcome there any time BYOB!!

Barney Jones said...

The Force is weeping I hope your happy.