Monday, April 28, 2008

Global Warming Ate My Hamster

The inventor of the Internet and presidential election loser Al Gore never mentioned this in his film 'An Inconsistent Truth' about a strange consequence of the climate change caused by Global Warming that has been more executions of witches.

Every piece of unseasonable weather or high temperature has people saying News speak words like 'Global warming, Carbon Footprint or Carbon off-set' but the indirect social and political impact in poor countries is not just mild winters and early springs but include upheavals and civil wars and even more witches hacked to death with machetes.

In rural Tanzania, murders of elderly women accused of witchcraft are a very common form of homicide. And when Tanzania suffers unusual rainfall like drought or flooding witch-killings double, according to a study by Edward Miguel, an economist at the University of California, Berkeley.

“In bad years, the killings explode,” Professor Miguel said. He believes that if climate change causes more drought years in Tanzania, the result will be more elderly women executed there and in other poor countries that still commonly attack these vile evil drought causing witches.

The European witch-burnings between 1520 and 1770 may also have resulted from climate variations and the resulting crop failures, economic distress and search for scapegoats.

Emily Oster, a University of Chicago economist, tracked witch hunts and weather in Western Europe during those times and found a close correlation: colder weather led to more crackdowns on witches.

In particular, Europe’s “little ice age” led to a sharp cooling in the late 1500s, and that corresponds to a renewal in witchcraft trials after a long lull. And there’s also micro-evidence: in one area, a brutally cold May in 1626 led outraged peasants to call for punishment of witches thought responsible.

There is abundant evidence that economic stress and crop failures as climate scientists anticipate in poor countries can lead to violence and upheavals unlike all the rest of the time when countries in Africa and the Middle East are always at peace.

In the United States, for example, some historians have found correlations between recessions or declines in farm values and increased lynchings of blacks and during warmer periods hemorrhoids itch more which causes agitation and short tempers.

Ethnic conflict in Darfur was exacerbated by drought and competition for water, and some experts see it as the first war caused by climate change, nothing to do with religious ethnic cleansing carried out by the militia of the Sudanese government of course.

These climate scientists seem to think like Global Warming itself violence and civil war is new to the poor countries of the world. David Livingstone the fine Scottish missionary once described Africa as 'the open sore of the world' that was in the 1800's long before the Liberian warlords, the child soldiers of the Congo and Robert Mugabe who runs his country into the ground at the bidding of the communists.

Witches turned my cow's milk sour and my blog bitter I see nothing wrong with killing them.The more powerful male witches who are called Warlocks are not mentioned. I wouldn't be surprised if they caused Global Warming itself to eliminate the competition.

In a shocking study carried out by OBB News it was found that 98% of Climate Scientists are a afraid to get real jobs.
30 years ago it was an Ice-Age predicted and now its the whole planet heating up, its funny that during these times of world scares Climate Scientists get more funding and job security.


The Troll said...

One of your best posts.

frogpondsrock said...

And Don't forget that you yourself told me that global warming is to blame for my fat arse...

cheers Kim

Anonymous said...

Global warming gave me a small penis.